I really needed to get the posts from my past blog up on the site. It is a record of my life that I wanted to keep and not let just vanish. What I didn’t need, right now anyway, was to read some of it.
There are some posts I read through today that have put me in a reflective frame of mind. Not many, just a few, but they highlight some of the more unhappy things that happened in the last 12 years. I’d forgotten they were there. They happened so I will leave them. They are a learning experience that should not be forgotten. Hopefully one day they won’t have the emotional impact on me that they had today.
I try not to dwell on or in the past and if I do I try to learn from my mistakes. For me that’s not any easy task. I take friendships and loyalty very serious. Like a lot of people, I have few people I consider to be true close friends. I can count them on the fingers of one hand. In the past three years those friendships and loyalties have been put to the test. Even so it’s hard for me to let go of people who I count among the few close friends or family.
Some friends have called me crazy for not letting go of people and things from my past. I guess maybe I am, it’s hard to not care about people, even the ones that may have hurt or betrayed me. I’m a believer that anything can be salvaged. It may not be the same as it was, then again maybe it will be better.
I am grateful for my friends and family. Even for the ones who may have hurt me.